Resolution #1

So I won't say that I've never made New Year's Resolutions, because I most certainly have, but they've never been a really big deal to me. What has been kind of a big deal to me is that fantastic energetic feeling I get at the beginning of a new year. I feel like I have a clean slate. An opportunity to be a better version of myself. This year I'm trying to harness some of that good feeling and keep it with me throughout the year.

To that end, I'm not going to put a huge list of resolutions out there only to feel overwhelmed and well, sad when I don't meet them all. Instead I'm going to write individual posts about whatever goals (or resolutions if you will) I'm working on. (Granted, there is a huge list of "resolutions" in my journal, and I will use that as a reference point throughout the year.)

The first resolution I'm working on (besides my weight, which I've already talked about a lot) is being a better student. Or more specifically, I made a promise to myself that for my two winter intensive classes I would do everything that the syllabus says to do. I would attend every class, read all of the required reading and do all of the homework.

Now while this might not sound monumental to most, it is for me. I've always been kind of a slacker when it comes to school. Granted, I've always gotten by just fine and most people would probably have no idea, but my slacker ways are rampant when it comes to school. I can say I have yet to open a textbook and I'm over halfway done with my MBA. I have yet to go to every class session for any full length class (I did make it through one half length class without missing a session though!) I'm never prepared for discussions in class and I truly just do the minimum to get by.

I've always done this. Ever since I can remember this is how I have treated school, and I've always felt guilty about it. Sure, I make decent grades (even good I suppose) and that's the barometer for success in school, but what about my own personal fulfillment? What about learning for the sake of learning? What about trying to learn since each class I attend costs me roughly $500 PER CLASS SESSION?

So I'm trying an experiment. I'm committing to trying and completing my next two classes completely. After that I will re-evaluate. If I don't get any personal satisfaction out of my experiment then I can happily go back to my slacker ways, hopefully guilt free. And if by some chance I actually do feel better and learn more by keeping with my commitment, then I will consider keeping up with it for a longer period of time. Because at the end of the day, while grades don't really matter, my happiness does, and maybe this is one way to get a little more out of something that consumes a good deal of my free time right now.

Wish me luck!